Congratulations to Tracee Ellis Ross for winning an NAACP Image Award for Best Actress in a Comedy Series!
Y'all know I went to Paris, so I owe you an update. It's COMING SOON....
Wednesday, March 7, 2007
Something or Nothing?
Written February 19th
I absolutely adore movies and my father is a huge movie buff as well. He never vacations and is always working, but in the little free time he allots himself, he sees just about any movie. Sometimes it’s hard for me to keep up. Early last week, he called me to discuss Tyler Perry’s Daddy’s Little Girls, but I had not yet seen it. I was aware of the plot: A m
an trying to gain custody of his 3 young daughters is working as a driver and finds himself driving a successful attorney. Some how, some way love blossoms and the two must deal with scrutiny from her friends and, of course, her own self-consciousness. My dad was concerned. Does class discrimination exist in dating in the black community (or any community for that matter)? I pondered his inquiry and with cautiousness and replied, “Dad, I think, for women, it is important to consider whether or not someone can take care of you.” He wasn’t buying it and basically decided it’s a shame that we behave that way. Hmmm, I thought. I take my father’s thoughts very seriously. His words always move me to think, act, or reconsider a position. At this time I still hadn’t seen the movie.
Daddy’s Little Girls, starring Idris Elba (Stringer Bell from the Wire) and Gabrielle Union in the lead roles, Monty and Julia. The fabulous Tracee Ellis Ross played a supporting role as one of Julia’s scrutinizing friends (the other was Terri J. Vaughn). Julia, the uptight lawyer, is more than hesitant to date Monty…her driver…with 3 kids… a ghetto, crack-selling baby mama…and some serious prior legal trouble. Are Julia’s apprehensions reasonable? In the film,
every situation is exaggerated. Julia is insanely uptight and judgmental and Monty’s circumstances are abruptly and dramatically thrown in her face. Obviously, their incomes were significantly different too. These are the things that any woman considers when choosing a partner, and even more likely for Julia, these are the observations she assesses instantly. Some people, like my father, find this thought process unfair. I thought very seriously about it all week intending to justify my position to my father.
I got a lecture from a male friend about the fact that black women, women period, will forever be unhappy because we won’t date the poor man. We fought all night because I refused to accept that factoring in a prospective mate’s present career and/or financial security in the selection process is negative. Well, he was very passionate about this. “I know there are [women] I have on layaway.” Meaning: There are women that, if his financial situation was different or when it is different, he knows these women will want him. He obviously feels this is ridiculously unfair, but accepts it as fact, assisting his conclusion that women worry about the wrong things when choosing a partner.
My opinion is, as I stated to my father, women typically want a man who can provide for and/or assist her in the lifestyle of her choosing. I am willing to bet that men think similarly. It is about more than money, too. We want to know that our partner isn’t uncomfortably placed in our social circles, professional activities, and interests. (I hope this makes sense in my attempt to be both diplomatic and precise in my assessment.) Additionally, any person that has an abundance of wealth probably doesn’t care what their partner’s financial or social status is – more than likely they 1) aren’t worried about being the financial stability of a significant other and/or 2) have no need to impress any professional superiors. Now, know that I believe in LOVE above all. I don’t care how much money you have (yeah, I said it). That is my personal belief, BUT first impressions are the world and while my father did make me feel a little bad for the prejudgment, it is no more superficial than judging someone based on their looks. As easily as we hope the ugly dude doesn’t come over and holla, I will avoid the Greyhound employee loading my bags on the bus (let’s not talk about the fact that I ride the bus). Unfortunately, we may not get to know a great guy, but just like your friends say when you have a bad break up – “there are lot’s of men out there.”
However, like I said, my dad’s opinion matters to me a lot. He is seldom wrong (in my eyes), so I did a little research. The most significant of which was Nanette* (clearly a fake name) who dated and is currently engaged to the security guard at her job, a man who held his security post while in law school and has since graduated. So, naturally, I asked her what she thought of him before she found out he was a law student. He was cute and that was the extent of it. CASE AND POINT – she would not have got into a relationship with this man had he not been pursuing higher education.
Many other women also confided in me that they shied away from the garbage man, the waiter, or the cabbie for the same reason I had expressed to my dad - security.
But is this a female phenomenon? I analyzed many male responses to the quandary. I asked my coworker Lewis* if he would date the fine-ass cashier at McDonald’s. He said no and we established that we don’t mind paying for dinner every once in a while, but breakfast, lunch, and dinner on me when he or she is contributing only a McDonald’s employee discount is not whatsup.
I was frustrated by my research, because, to a certain extent, I wanted to see the injustice in my belief and show my dad I was behind his criticism. That just wasn’t the truth. My vetting process in the dating pool was nothing but natural and MOST PEOPLE with which I consulted agreed. It’s not that we can’t fall for the “poor” guy, but we have to consider compatibility and potential along with physical attraction and we have to do so as early as possible. If, somehow, you make it past the process of elimination, and your charm permeates my heart, that’s a whole ‘nother’ conversation. DADDY’S LITTLE GIRLS SPOILER: Of course, the succesful lawyer and her driver with the three kids made it work and it was all beautiful in the end...but what you didn't see was what happened the next day. Did the relationship work? Was Julia able to survive the instant family a man with 3 kids brings? Was Monty ok with Julia making tons more money than he did? Who knows the answer to these questions. I only set out to discover if there was something wrong with women screening potential dates based on their job or career and I found that it was as shameless as the first look.
I absolutely adore movies and my father is a huge movie buff as well. He never vacations and is always working, but in the little free time he allots himself, he sees just about any movie. Sometimes it’s hard for me to keep up. Early last week, he called me to discuss Tyler Perry’s Daddy’s Little Girls, but I had not yet seen it. I was aware of the plot: A m
an trying to gain custody of his 3 young daughters is working as a driver and finds himself driving a successful attorney. Some how, some way love blossoms and the two must deal with scrutiny from her friends and, of course, her own self-consciousness. My dad was concerned. Does class discrimination exist in dating in the black community (or any community for that matter)? I pondered his inquiry and with cautiousness and replied, “Dad, I think, for women, it is important to consider whether or not someone can take care of you.” He wasn’t buying it and basically decided it’s a shame that we behave that way. Hmmm, I thought. I take my father’s thoughts very seriously. His words always move me to think, act, or reconsider a position. At this time I still hadn’t seen the movie.Daddy’s Little Girls, starring Idris Elba (Stringer Bell from the Wire) and Gabrielle Union in the lead roles, Monty and Julia. The fabulous Tracee Ellis Ross played a supporting role as one of Julia’s scrutinizing friends (the other was Terri J. Vaughn). Julia, the uptight lawyer, is more than hesitant to date Monty…her driver…with 3 kids… a ghetto, crack-selling baby mama…and some serious prior legal trouble. Are Julia’s apprehensions reasonable? In the film,
every situation is exaggerated. Julia is insanely uptight and judgmental and Monty’s circumstances are abruptly and dramatically thrown in her face. Obviously, their incomes were significantly different too. These are the things that any woman considers when choosing a partner, and even more likely for Julia, these are the observations she assesses instantly. Some people, like my father, find this thought process unfair. I thought very seriously about it all week intending to justify my position to my father.I got a lecture from a male friend about the fact that black women, women period, will forever be unhappy because we won’t date the poor man. We fought all night because I refused to accept that factoring in a prospective mate’s present career and/or financial security in the selection process is negative. Well, he was very passionate about this. “I know there are [women] I have on layaway.” Meaning: There are women that, if his financial situation was different or when it is different, he knows these women will want him. He obviously feels this is ridiculously unfair, but accepts it as fact, assisting his conclusion that women worry about the wrong things when choosing a partner.
My opinion is, as I stated to my father, women typically want a man who can provide for and/or assist her in the lifestyle of her choosing. I am willing to bet that men think similarly. It is about more than money, too. We want to know that our partner isn’t uncomfortably placed in our social circles, professional activities, and interests. (I hope this makes sense in my attempt to be both diplomatic and precise in my assessment.) Additionally, any person that has an abundance of wealth probably doesn’t care what their partner’s financial or social status is – more than likely they 1) aren’t worried about being the financial stability of a significant other and/or 2) have no need to impress any professional superiors. Now, know that I believe in LOVE above all. I don’t care how much money you have (yeah, I said it). That is my personal belief, BUT first impressions are the world and while my father did make me feel a little bad for the prejudgment, it is no more superficial than judging someone based on their looks. As easily as we hope the ugly dude doesn’t come over and holla, I will avoid the Greyhound employee loading my bags on the bus (let’s not talk about the fact that I ride the bus). Unfortunately, we may not get to know a great guy, but just like your friends say when you have a bad break up – “there are lot’s of men out there.”
However, like I said, my dad’s opinion matters to me a lot. He is seldom wrong (in my eyes), so I did a little research. The most significant of which was Nanette* (clearly a fake name) who dated and is currently engaged to the security guard at her job, a man who held his security post while in law school and has since graduated. So, naturally, I asked her what she thought of him before she found out he was a law student. He was cute and that was the extent of it. CASE AND POINT – she would not have got into a relationship with this man had he not been pursuing higher education.
Many other women also confided in me that they shied away from the garbage man, the waiter, or the cabbie for the same reason I had expressed to my dad - security.
But is this a female phenomenon? I analyzed many male responses to the quandary. I asked my coworker Lewis* if he would date the fine-ass cashier at McDonald’s. He said no and we established that we don’t mind paying for dinner every once in a while, but breakfast, lunch, and dinner on me when he or she is contributing only a McDonald’s employee discount is not whatsup.I was frustrated by my research, because, to a certain extent, I wanted to see the injustice in my belief and show my dad I was behind his criticism. That just wasn’t the truth. My vetting process in the dating pool was nothing but natural and MOST PEOPLE with which I consulted agreed. It’s not that we can’t fall for the “poor” guy, but we have to consider compatibility and potential along with physical attraction and we have to do so as early as possible. If, somehow, you make it past the process of elimination, and your charm permeates my heart, that’s a whole ‘nother’ conversation. DADDY’S LITTLE GIRLS SPOILER: Of course, the succesful lawyer and her driver with the three kids made it work and it was all beautiful in the end...but what you didn't see was what happened the next day. Did the relationship work? Was Julia able to survive the instant family a man with 3 kids brings? Was Monty ok with Julia making tons more money than he did? Who knows the answer to these questions. I only set out to discover if there was something wrong with women screening potential dates based on their job or career and I found that it was as shameless as the first look.
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
A Legacy Not to be Forgotten
In honor of one of my favorite episodes of Sex & The City which aired tonight on the CW, I have decided to post an article that I wrote in college that will always ring true...
Dazzling Chanel suits, Prada and Cavalli ensembles, Fendi and Dior handbags, the signature Manolo Blahnik stilettos, and the endless jewelry ranging from a gold name plate to the large colorful plastic
earrings of the 80s. But for trendsetting and fascinating fashion ideas, we can all just turn to an E! Red Carpet or the Style Channel.
Sex and the City is a guaranteed 30-minute vogue runway, but that’s not why we are drawn to it week after week and buy the DVD sets. So it must be the amazing, multiple orgasm, “scream his name” sex the ladies talk about in every episode. Actually, it is the exact opposite. Carrie Bradshaw, Miranda Hobbes, Charlotte York, and Samantha Jones are your best friends. They don’t sit around talking about their unattainable love lives, because they don’t have them. Besides Carrie’s thousand-dollar shoe fetish, little about them is unattainable. They are four women whose experiences cross emotional, sexual, heterosexual, and racial boundaries. Beyond that, they cross television boundaries. Since 1998, Sex and the City has been like watching a 5-year movie. But their sexy anecdotes definitely don’t go unnoticed.
In the book Sex and the City: Kiss and Tell, writer Amy Sohn discusses the way the show’s creator, Darren Star, refused to deal with sex as an awkward topic. “He didn’t like the way networks tended to handle adult sexuality: in a wink-wink, nudge-nudge style, euphemistic and adolescent. Instead he wanted to create a true adult comedy in which the sex could be handled in an upfront and honest way.” And what followed was an epidemic.
The show can be easily criticized on the surface for its blunt sexual narratives, but that is also its charm. We tune in to get an objective view of situations that affect us every day, both in sexual and platonic relationships. Oh, and please believe the opinions are objective; There is a tendency to accuse television of inaccurately representing people and subject matter because their goal is entertainment. However, Sex and the City’s writers, directors, producers, and actors base the material on real events and experiences in their own lives, which personifies why we soak in every word. These four ladies really are human, because their stories are based on human experiences.
In Sex and the City’s six seasons, the themes and development of each character have been a major component of its success. They talk, they disagree, they laugh (at one another and themselves), and they fight loudly and honestly. They also cry, and we understand each moment of each emotion, not just because we relate, but because we know them. They’ve tackled anal sex, phone sex, baby talk, marriage in your 30’s, and alternatively, death, abortion, cancer, divorce, and adultery. Nothing is too outlandish and nothing is too serious for these ladies.
So, in season 4, in an episode called “Time and Punishment,” when Aiden asks Carrie never to talk to Big again after she has cheated on him and she tells him she can’t do that, we gasp having expected her to lie and promise him whatever he wants. Instead, she stands at her door repeating one statement, “You have to forgive me.” She never touches him. She is begging Aiden for his forgiveness with her sincere eyes, fearing he will leave her doorway, but overflowing with honesty. And with that truth that she repeats 7 times, we watch Aiden realize its magnitude as Carrie accepts that she has to forgive herself as well. He walks forward and embraces her, slowly pasting their relationship back together. While we breathe an enormous sigh of relief, as the end of another episode clutches some powerful emotion from us, and we are reminded of the marvel that is Sex and the City.
The Phenomenon
Dazzling Chanel suits, Prada and Cavalli ensembles, Fendi and Dior handbags, the signature Manolo Blahnik stilettos, and the endless jewelry ranging from a gold name plate to the large colorful plastic
earrings of the 80s. But for trendsetting and fascinating fashion ideas, we can all just turn to an E! Red Carpet or the Style Channel.Sex and the City is a guaranteed 30-minute vogue runway, but that’s not why we are drawn to it week after week and buy the DVD sets. So it must be the amazing, multiple orgasm, “scream his name” sex the ladies talk about in every episode. Actually, it is the exact opposite. Carrie Bradshaw, Miranda Hobbes, Charlotte York, and Samantha Jones are your best friends. They don’t sit around talking about their unattainable love lives, because they don’t have them. Besides Carrie’s thousand-dollar shoe fetish, little about them is unattainable. They are four women whose experiences cross emotional, sexual, heterosexual, and racial boundaries. Beyond that, they cross television boundaries. Since 1998, Sex and the City has been like watching a 5-year movie. But their sexy anecdotes definitely don’t go unnoticed.
In the book Sex and the City: Kiss and Tell, writer Amy Sohn discusses the way the show’s creator, Darren Star, refused to deal with sex as an awkward topic. “He didn’t like the way networks tended to handle adult sexuality: in a wink-wink, nudge-nudge style, euphemistic and adolescent. Instead he wanted to create a true adult comedy in which the sex could be handled in an upfront and honest way.” And what followed was an epidemic.
The show can be easily criticized on the surface for its blunt sexual narratives, but that is also its charm. We tune in to get an objective view of situations that affect us every day, both in sexual and platonic relationships. Oh, and please believe the opinions are objective; There is a tendency to accuse television of inaccurately representing people and subject matter because their goal is entertainment. However, Sex and the City’s writers, directors, producers, and actors base the material on real events and experiences in their own lives, which personifies why we soak in every word. These four ladies really are human, because their stories are based on human experiences.
In Sex and the City’s six seasons, the themes and development of each character have been a major component of its success. They talk, they disagree, they laugh (at one another and themselves), and they fight loudly and honestly. They also cry, and we understand each moment of each emotion, not just because we relate, but because we know them. They’ve tackled anal sex, phone sex, baby talk, marriage in your 30’s, and alternatively, death, abortion, cancer, divorce, and adultery. Nothing is too outlandish and nothing is too serious for these ladies.
So, in season 4, in an episode called “Time and Punishment,” when Aiden asks Carrie never to talk to Big again after she has cheated on him and she tells him she can’t do that, we gasp having expected her to lie and promise him whatever he wants. Instead, she stands at her door repeating one statement, “You have to forgive me.” She never touches him. She is begging Aiden for his forgiveness with her sincere eyes, fearing he will leave her doorway, but overflowing with honesty. And with that truth that she repeats 7 times, we watch Aiden realize its magnitude as Carrie accepts that she has to forgive herself as well. He walks forward and embraces her, slowly pasting their relationship back together. While we breathe an enormous sigh of relief, as the end of another episode clutches some powerful emotion from us, and we are reminded of the marvel that is Sex and the City.
Monday, February 12, 2007
For The Little Person in Our Lives
“If it wasn’t for me, you wouldn’t even know where to pee.”
That’s what I plan to say to my godson when he gets grown enough to talk back and have dates, you know, just to put him in his place. For Christmas, I bought him a potty training kiddie toilet picked out by his mother, my lovely friend, Erika.
Last Friday, February 9th, Anthony Crenshaw Jr. turned 2-years old 
and I wasn’t able to be there because they are in Texas, but Erika made sure to include me in the festivities. “We are going to have a party with ice cream and a C-A-R-S cake,” she said, Anthony playfully screaming in the tub while she bathed him.
I didn’t get it, “What? The cake is shaped like a car?”
“No, like the movie.”
“Ohhh.”
“Girl, he loves that movie. We can’t even say the name of it in front of him or we’ll have to watch it.” We laughed.
Don’t you just love the little people in our lives (especially when they don’t belong to us)? Chervonti has Michael and London. Kim has Trey Trey (and Jordon, new baby Nyla, Isaiah, Alyssa). My boyfriend has 5 cousins under 8 (that I know) and probably 100 more (he has a huge family) and they make such an adorable difference. They give us someone to invest in, someone to nurture, and someone to remind us of innocence. So, HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my baby (as I adoringly call him, thanks to my baby’s mama, Erika, and my baby’s daddy, Anthony Sr).
The GRAMMY’S
As tired as I am of hearing the song, “Listen,” I sat through it one more time just seconds ago (I am writing this as I am watching the Grammy’s). [Sidebar: Fergie looks a thousand times better from a distance and does Will I Am has a Swarovski crystal Bluetooth earpiece?] I am overwhelmed with a feeling of awe for Beyonce Knowles. You may have feelings about her talent as actress, House of Dereon, or any of her many other endeavors, but she is a staple in our culture, our generation, and musical history. 
Her voice is incredible, her very natural beauty: undeniable, and her image of sincere kindness and purity is remarkable. SHE is breathtaking – and maybe I don’t feel it every time I see her, but whether she is singing “Freakum Dress” or “Dangerously In Love,” her voice, her passionate energy reverberates within any critical music lover. I respect her for that and was totally moved by her performance no matter how ‘over’ “Listen” I am.
WHAT A F-ING TREAT! 
I am currently pacing back and forth from my bed to my computer totally enthralled in John Legend, Corinne Bailey Ray, and John Mayer, dying to listen and absorb every word, note, and melody but also trying to write about this emotive experience as it is occurring. Thank God for music – that’s all I have to say. What an awesome trio they just made. I hate to be such an entertainment groupie, but I absolutely love award show performances and wish that the Grammy’s, Academy Awards, and other shows would make an album of the live performances and see them! Wouldn’t that be a huge money-maker!? There has to be a reason that it hasn’t happened yet. Ah well.
Unfortunately, I only got to experience the first hour of the show (and tivo-ed the rest), but check out this site for a nice breakdown of Grammy night.
**Also, for an entertaining, but very truthful look at the "day of love," Valentine's Day, view RAW Magazine's HE SAID/SHE SAID column. It's dead on!
Monday, February 5, 2007
It's Whether You Play The Game
While my beau has left me for Spain (not permanently; He’ll be back Sunday), I occupied myself with a couple of friends, a great movie, and the artist formerly known as-and then re-known-as Prince.
On Friday, I celebrated 24 years of the life of my friend of almost 10 years, Chervonti. We had a birthday dinner at the mexican restaurant, Lauriol Plaza, complete with balloons, ice cream cake, and fajitas! Every minute of the weekend was interesting and productive, but it was also one of refl
ection. I was finally able to see Little Miss Sunshine and it was a fantastic movie! I couldn’t be more pleased and enthusiastic. I worried that it would be the dry humor of, say, The Royal Tenenbaums, but it wasn’t at all! It was downright hilarious with an adorable little girl and message of family and life. It centers around a 10-year old girl getting to a beauty pageant without being a flowery PG film (it's rated R). The film was a reminder that, “It is not whether you win or lose…” The film focuses on winning versus losing, fulfilling people's expectations, and going for what you want. Life is an everyday test of courage and determination – SEE THIS FILM.
I was happy to stay awake past 12 (which is late for me) laughing at Little Miss Sunshine even though I knew I had to get up early for another activity that I don’t participate on often - I went to church, y’all, and the message continued. The sermon discussed the "warrior spirit," and the mountains we can move with faith the size of a mustard seed. It was a perfect touch after Little Miss Sunshine.
A couple of hours later, I was geared up for the most exciting time of the new year: Super Bowl Commercials, but I was met with an unbelievable surprise - Prince! It wasn't that I didn't know he was the halftime show, but DAMN. That was no ordinary halftime show! Prince SHOWED OUT, as we say in Texas. That concert was amazing and it reminded me that (a) Prince is the greatest entertainer alive and (b) Prince is so damn feminine, I think I'm a lesbian. How can a petite man who wears 3-inch heels, has hair straighter than mine, and sings songs like "Do Me, Baby" in a high pitch be so sexy all the time? There is no rhyme or reason to the phenomenon, but he is an outstanding performer and musical genius. Who would have thought a
10-year old girl, church, and a tiny Minnesotan would make my weekend?
Found It In A Magazine
The January In Style Magazine (with Beyonce on the cover) had an outstanding story called “The Bargain Hunters Guide to Style” which confirmed some of the
shopping rules I already know as well as gave me some amazing tips to share.
First, thanks to Mark Gill, I have already got this one down: Invest in shoes and handbags. Spending your money on some beautifully crafted shoes can make a simple outfit look immediately chic. I have been shocked at the countless people who are drawn to my $--- pair of shoes and compliment them.
In Style quoted “How to Be a Budget Fashionista” author Kathryn Finney on valuing your purchase. If you think about how many times you will wear something, divide the price by that number. She says, however, “If you got something on sale for $5, but you just don’t use it, you just wasted $5.” So true! And sometimes we don’t mind the waste because we think, “Well, I may wear it,” but that money adds up and it’s just not smart shopping.
When shopping at the Forever 21s, H&Ms, etc, neutral colors work best. The magazine recommends chocolates, nudes, or whites. They quote stylist George Kostiopoulos, "Wearing a color like hot pink in a cheap fabric is like holding up a sign that says, ‘I didn’t pay anything for this.’" If you don’t believe him, think about anything you have every purchased on a designer level in a bright color and think about the vibrancy of that piece. Again, it’s about the quality of the materials.
I won’t quote the whole magazine, because you really should read it, but between my pre-Paris shopping trip and In Style’s tips, here are a couple more suggestions:
Lastly...
Say what you want about Diddy. Say what you want about Kim Porter. But the two of them made some beautiful babies and you can't say these pictures aren't adorable!
On Friday, I celebrated 24 years of the life of my friend of almost 10 years, Chervonti. We had a birthday dinner at the mexican restaurant, Lauriol Plaza, complete with balloons, ice cream cake, and fajitas! Every minute of the weekend was interesting and productive, but it was also one of refl
ection. I was finally able to see Little Miss Sunshine and it was a fantastic movie! I couldn’t be more pleased and enthusiastic. I worried that it would be the dry humor of, say, The Royal Tenenbaums, but it wasn’t at all! It was downright hilarious with an adorable little girl and message of family and life. It centers around a 10-year old girl getting to a beauty pageant without being a flowery PG film (it's rated R). The film was a reminder that, “It is not whether you win or lose…” The film focuses on winning versus losing, fulfilling people's expectations, and going for what you want. Life is an everyday test of courage and determination – SEE THIS FILM.I was happy to stay awake past 12 (which is late for me) laughing at Little Miss Sunshine even though I knew I had to get up early for another activity that I don’t participate on often - I went to church, y’all, and the message continued. The sermon discussed the "warrior spirit," and the mountains we can move with faith the size of a mustard seed. It was a perfect touch after Little Miss Sunshine.
A couple of hours later, I was geared up for the most exciting time of the new year: Super Bowl Commercials, but I was met with an unbelievable surprise - Prince! It wasn't that I didn't know he was the halftime show, but DAMN. That was no ordinary halftime show! Prince SHOWED OUT, as we say in Texas. That concert was amazing and it reminded me that (a) Prince is the greatest entertainer alive and (b) Prince is so damn feminine, I think I'm a lesbian. How can a petite man who wears 3-inch heels, has hair straighter than mine, and sings songs like "Do Me, Baby" in a high pitch be so sexy all the time? There is no rhyme or reason to the phenomenon, but he is an outstanding performer and musical genius. Who would have thought a
10-year old girl, church, and a tiny Minnesotan would make my weekend?
Found It In A Magazine
The January In Style Magazine (with Beyonce on the cover) had an outstanding story called “The Bargain Hunters Guide to Style” which confirmed some of the
shopping rules I already know as well as gave me some amazing tips to share.First, thanks to Mark Gill, I have already got this one down: Invest in shoes and handbags. Spending your money on some beautifully crafted shoes can make a simple outfit look immediately chic. I have been shocked at the countless people who are drawn to my $--- pair of shoes and compliment them.
In Style quoted “How to Be a Budget Fashionista” author Kathryn Finney on valuing your purchase. If you think about how many times you will wear something, divide the price by that number. She says, however, “If you got something on sale for $5, but you just don’t use it, you just wasted $5.” So true! And sometimes we don’t mind the waste because we think, “Well, I may wear it,” but that money adds up and it’s just not smart shopping.
When shopping at the Forever 21s, H&Ms, etc, neutral colors work best. The magazine recommends chocolates, nudes, or whites. They quote stylist George Kostiopoulos, "Wearing a color like hot pink in a cheap fabric is like holding up a sign that says, ‘I didn’t pay anything for this.’" If you don’t believe him, think about anything you have every purchased on a designer level in a bright color and think about the vibrancy of that piece. Again, it’s about the quality of the materials.
I won’t quote the whole magazine, because you really should read it, but between my pre-Paris shopping trip and In Style’s tips, here are a couple more suggestions:
- When shopping, write down your findings. You may be able to find it cheaper on the web.
- Check department store jewelry for great items that sparkle and shine like the real thing. At Lord & Taylor, I spent 40 bucks on an amazing pair of Betsey Johnson earrings that dangle like no other! They are dramatic and classy showstoppers. (See the ghetto picture of my earrings to the right.)
- If you don’t buy something, but you can’t get it off your
mind, go back. Destiny calls! I bought some boots that I'm totally in love with after I saw them several times without making the purchase - it was fate. When I finally bought them, they were half the original price.
Lastly...
Say what you want about Diddy. Say what you want about Kim Porter. But the two of them made some beautiful babies and you can't say these pictures aren't adorable!
Monday, January 29, 2007
If You Don't Know, Now You Know
I am going to Fashion Week in Paris! Mark Gill, designer and stylist, invited me along to view the Fall ’07 Collections and I jumped at the opportunity. What a dream! So, in preparation, I need new hair (style, that is), a completely pre-arranged stylish wardrobe, and to calm my nerve so I don’t look like a crazy fashion-groupie for a week. To top off this absolutely amazing event, my darling friend, Porsha Summerville, will be there too!
UPDATE: I took the GRE again and did an awesome job! I am so glad to have that test behind me and for about 3 days, I was totally relaxed, but now I am back to juggling a million things at once and can no longer be free. While waiting to hear back about graduate school, I have a full-time job, PR duties for R.A.W. Magazine, 4 magazines to catch up on (I just got around to reading the January Vanity Fair this week), a great book about leadership and some scripts to get through for a film project. As usual, somehow I find myself with a million commitments. Oh, and my sister is getting married and I am the maid of honor….you can’t imagine…
The First Lady
Miss Renee (my mom) came in town this weekend and we met The First Lady! When I arrived at my mom’s hotel (her DC home) Sunday, three darling men sat in the
lounge where we meet, eat, and drink, among other things. Greg, Luke and the fabulous Istvan (right). Now, all three were fantastic, but to the left you see the Pepto Bismol pink robe that was the topic of conversation. Purchased in the hotel’s giftshop, it was hilarious to see the adorable man bearing the title, “First Lady.” Our three companions were amazing: Luke, the PR prince, George, the Luis Vuitton toting lush, and Istvan, “The First Lady,” a make-up artist and master of disguise. The sexy brown haired hottie showed me several Myspace pictures with blonde hair of all lengths complimented by dramatic make-up. The afternoon was blissful, having a lot to do with the fact that George gave me a beautiful and warm taupe Fendi wrap, but also because the gentlemen were delightful company.
UPDATE: I took the GRE again and did an awesome job! I am so glad to have that test behind me and for about 3 days, I was totally relaxed, but now I am back to juggling a million things at once and can no longer be free. While waiting to hear back about graduate school, I have a full-time job, PR duties for R.A.W. Magazine, 4 magazines to catch up on (I just got around to reading the January Vanity Fair this week), a great book about leadership and some scripts to get through for a film project. As usual, somehow I find myself with a million commitments. Oh, and my sister is getting married and I am the maid of honor….you can’t imagine…
The First Lady
Miss Renee (my mom) came in town this weekend and we met The First Lady! When I arrived at my mom’s hotel (her DC home) Sunday, three darling men sat in the
lounge where we meet, eat, and drink, among other things. Greg, Luke and the fabulous Istvan (right). Now, all three were fantastic, but to the left you see the Pepto Bismol pink robe that was the topic of conversation. Purchased in the hotel’s giftshop, it was hilarious to see the adorable man bearing the title, “First Lady.” Our three companions were amazing: Luke, the PR prince, George, the Luis Vuitton toting lush, and Istvan, “The First Lady,” a make-up artist and master of disguise. The sexy brown haired hottie showed me several Myspace pictures with blonde hair of all lengths complimented by dramatic make-up. The afternoon was blissful, having a lot to do with the fact that George gave me a beautiful and warm taupe Fendi wrap, but also because the gentlemen were delightful company.
Monday, January 15, 2007
Recently on TBS, I watched a Season 4 episode of Sex and the City just after Carrie cut her hair. Because I am searching for a new hairstyle for my trip to Paris next month (I will discuss this at a later date), her color caught my eye. I love the two-toned look! I am sure you can imagine how many pictures there are of Sarah Jessica Parker on the web, but these are the only ones I could find with this look, you get the idea.
Meagan Good – I am beginning to think Ms. Good has a large forehead, because she does not leave the house without those predictably placed bangs. Pretty style, but tired!
Tamia – I will give it to Tamia. When I “google imaged” her, a plethora of striking looks came up and I am sure she has brought about some “Girl, would this look good on me” discussions for many black women.
After only a few names, I am back at square one. Gabrielle Union, Brandy, Golden Brooks, Nia Long (thanks for the pixie cut, girl, but we can’t all pull it off), Sanaa (is it weave or not? I can’t figure it out), Kerry Washington, Thandie Newton, Zoe Saldana, Jada Pinkett Smith, Reginas King and Hall. Between weave or the typical black girl permed hair, little else is presented; When I think about cute hairstyles to try, I am seldom provoked to bring my hairstylist a picture of a black woman.
The moral of my story is much less detailed than my deliberation. I truly love the two-toned hair color worn by Sarah Jessica after season 4 of Sex and the City and I really want to know what it would look like on a black woman without having to be the test dummy myself.
FYI – While searching for black female superstars from which to steal hair ideas, I found this really cool website listing many notable black actresses and short bios: http://mahoganycafe.com/
MY OWN MAKEUP TIP:
I spent last week taking pictures of myself before I went to work. Sounds REALLY vain, but it was mostly because I tried some new make-up and hairstyles and I wanted to see what I looked like from different angles (ok, maybe a little vain). In the process, however, I discovered something for us all.
Do you see the pink highlight around my eyes? If you love it as much as I did, here's how I did it.
Application:
In the first hour of the new year, I was in a foul mood and wondering how great of a year this could possibly be if, during the first hour, I was miserable. Well, I have no complaints about the last two weeks and I am actually hoping the act of one man may influence us all...
NEW YEAR'S NEWS:
Who is this guy parlaying dangerously in the filth of a dirty subway...and for what? On the afternoon of January 2, 2007, 55-year old Wesley Autrey was taking his young daughters to their mother’s house and witnessed a young man having a seizure dangerously close to the subway tracks. After trying to calm the college student and allow him to sit with his back against Autrey’s legs, the young man had another seizure and fell off the platform and onto the track.
Long story short, Wesley Autrey made an instant decision to cover the convulsing victim with his own body to prevent his flailing limbs from suffering the force of the oncoming train. There
was roughly 21 and 24 inches from the teenager’s back to the bottom of the train, as the train traveled over the two of them. Autrey hugged the young man to lessen their mass and tried to make conversation to calm them both.
Autrey’s motivation was simple: he didn’t want his little girls to see a violent and bloody accident; His act of bravery was unparalleled. The humble construction worker and former navy man made an appearance on The Late Late Show with Dave Letterman shortly after the event. It is an outstanding interview that starts out slow because Autrey is nervous, but I have so much respect for Dave Letterman for recognizing the importance of this man’s story and drawing attention to it by interviewing the hero. I encourage you to view it on youtube.
Will Smith, everybody. Will Smith. Not since Ali has his talent shone so evidently as in The Pursuit of Happyness. This time, I didn’t even waste a night to express my feelings about the film. Honestly, you have seen it already. If you have seen 1 preview or read any sort of synopsis, you have seen this film, but the experience of it, is worth the trip. Hearing of someone struggling to
feed and provide shelter for his child is not new, but watching him do it, with fear in his eyes, but assertion in his step is inspirational.
If, for some reason, you have been living under a rock and don’t know what the Pursuit of Happyness is about, allow me: Chris Gardner was making very little money living with his girlfriend and raising their son. After she got tired and left him, he fought for a couple dollars here and there and faced homelessness. He is now making millions and it has nothing to do with the sales of his book or the film depicting this part of his life.
Often, I joke that if I had a child I would be more motivated. Cathy Hughes bought a radio station, then went through a divorce and lost her home. She had to sleep in the radio station with her young son eventually building a radio and television empire (Radio One & TVOne). Chris Gardner accepted an unpaid internship with the slight possibility of becoming a stockbroker and you don’t need to tell me that the idea of spending a night in a homeless shelter with his son fueled him in his pursuit to excel.
I know what it feels like to see yourself making a certain amount of money or fulfilling your
dream career, but for whatever reason, we are not taking the steps. Whether it is our generation or maybe just me, our obstacles range from laziness to fear, but we must overcome them. For Cathy Hughes and Chris Gardner, they had a mouth to feed, a life to nurture, and that served as just the motivation they required to achieve greatness. In retrospect, they did just that, and we can all now see the extent of it, but greatness is an everyday feat, completely attainable to you and me. Commit to achieving your best in all that you do and everyday you will have made a significant contribution to your own success and, undoubtedly, that of others. That is greatness.
So, climbing down off my horse, I hope that I sufficiently shared how The Pursuit of Happyness reminded me that motivation is within me. Oh, and before I step down completely, please remember to stay true to what you love, otherwise, you won’t be truly happy. On that note, have a great week and feel free to post comments on my blog if you want me to discuss something in the future.
I often wear my hair with a similar wavy texture, but my hair has been only a few shades away from extremely dark brown for as long as I can remember. Therefore, it would be a huge change to lighten such a thick top layer. I think the style is beautiful, but it is seldom seen on black women. The same look might be ghetto on a black woman…which brings me to my contemplation: Why is it that black women have so few examples of unique and chic hair icons? The same rings true for the celeb make-up tips magazine’s give. Often, I will go through a magazine and spot a beautiful make-up job or hair color or style, but the model will be white. Those looks are almost guaranteed to look completely different on me.
In fact, when I did my best to search for more two-toned looks on the internet, I found only limited options: two beautiful looks by two women who wear hair peices. 
I love the look, but neither of them has to live with it for more than an hour. (But, let me just say: GORGEOUS, B.)
Now, maybe I am frustrated because I don’t wear weave or wigs. Not that I have qualms with either, but Tyra’s locks are automatically disqualified because I can’t strive for a look that’s’ completely fabricated. (I hope I am not assuming too much by believing we are all aware that Tyra wears wigs.)
Here is my best attempt to demonstrate the selection available to black women:
Tracee Ellis Ross – She transformed her beautiful natural curls into what appears to be a roller set or large barrel curling iron version of the same do. Her volume is probably the hardest part of this look to imitate.
Beyonce – B is a great example of the various color and style options a various black women have. Because she goes through so many dramatic looks using wigs, and presumably, weave, she serves only as an inspiration to anyone whose natural hair texture might match hers that particular week. (I mean, come on, if you can successfully pull off the Foxy Cleopatra hair, it is not likely that your hair texture can also fulfill B’s smooth, straight tresses.)
Keyshia Cole – Another creative representative for fake hair. I don’t care if it is ghetto – I LOVE her two-toned red and blonde hair, but there is a certain level of celebrity required to pull it off. FYI – Most of us don’t have it.
Meagan Good – I am beginning to think Ms. Good has a large forehead, because she does not leave the house without those predictably placed bangs. Pretty style, but tired!
Tamia – I will give it to Tamia. When I “google imaged” her, a plethora of striking looks came up and I am sure she has brought about some “Girl, would this look good on me” discussions for many black women.
After only a few names, I am back at square one. Gabrielle Union, Brandy, Golden Brooks, Nia Long (thanks for the pixie cut, girl, but we can’t all pull it off), Sanaa (is it weave or not? I can’t figure it out), Kerry Washington, Thandie Newton, Zoe Saldana, Jada Pinkett Smith, Reginas King and Hall. Between weave or the typical black girl permed hair, little else is presented; When I think about cute hairstyles to try, I am seldom provoked to bring my hairstylist a picture of a black woman.
The moral of my story is much less detailed than my deliberation. I truly love the two-toned hair color worn by Sarah Jessica after season 4 of Sex and the City and I really want to know what it would look like on a black woman without having to be the test dummy myself.
FYI – While searching for black female superstars from which to steal hair ideas, I found this really cool website listing many notable black actresses and short bios: http://mahoganycafe.com/
MY OWN MAKEUP TIP:
I spent last week taking pictures of myself before I went to work. Sounds REALLY vain, but it was mostly because I tried some new make-up and hairstyles and I wanted to see what I looked like from different angles (ok, maybe a little vain). In the process, however, I discovered something for us all.
Do you see the pink highlight around my eyes? If you love it as much as I did, here's how I did it.
Application:
- CVS sells a brand of make-up brushes by Essence of Beauty. I used the Smudge Eye Shadow Applicator, which comes with 2 brushes that are really just pointed sponges. I used the larger of the two (it’s smaller than your pinky so don’t try it without the brushes. Click here to see a product similar to the brushes I am talking about).
- After the concealer and a nude shaded shadow over my lid, I applied the soft pink shade from my Bobbi Brown Shimmer Brick in Bronze (everyone needs a Shimmer Brick) in the part of my eye closest to my nose (as you can see). You can basically apply it wherever you like around the eye, but I had always seen celebrities in magazine with this look and thanks to my friend, Brooke I was able to find the right color and tools and recreate it.
In the first hour of the new year, I was in a foul mood and wondering how great of a year this could possibly be if, during the first hour, I was miserable. Well, I have no complaints about the last two weeks and I am actually hoping the act of one man may influence us all...
NEW YEAR'S NEWS:
"My Blue Hat Got Dirty"
Describing the moments the subway cars were going over him, Welsey Autrey said of the worst part about laying on top of a stranger in a drainage trench in the New York City subway, “My blue hat got dirty.” R E W I N D…A drainage trench in the subway?! Eew! This is the center area between the two tracks that guide the train on its path. Yes, the area where rats frolic and bums urinate, and mud, dirt, and grime collide to form new diseases.
Who is this guy parlaying dangerously in the filth of a dirty subway...and for what? On the afternoon of January 2, 2007, 55-year old Wesley Autrey was taking his young daughters to their mother’s house and witnessed a young man having a seizure dangerously close to the subway tracks. After trying to calm the college student and allow him to sit with his back against Autrey’s legs, the young man had another seizure and fell off the platform and onto the track.
Long story short, Wesley Autrey made an instant decision to cover the convulsing victim with his own body to prevent his flailing limbs from suffering the force of the oncoming train. There
was roughly 21 and 24 inches from the teenager’s back to the bottom of the train, as the train traveled over the two of them. Autrey hugged the young man to lessen their mass and tried to make conversation to calm them both.Autrey’s motivation was simple: he didn’t want his little girls to see a violent and bloody accident; His act of bravery was unparalleled. The humble construction worker and former navy man made an appearance on The Late Late Show with Dave Letterman shortly after the event. It is an outstanding interview that starts out slow because Autrey is nervous, but I have so much respect for Dave Letterman for recognizing the importance of this man’s story and drawing attention to it by interviewing the hero. I encourage you to view it on youtube.
Will Smith, everybody. Will Smith. Not since Ali has his talent shone so evidently as in The Pursuit of Happyness. This time, I didn’t even waste a night to express my feelings about the film. Honestly, you have seen it already. If you have seen 1 preview or read any sort of synopsis, you have seen this film, but the experience of it, is worth the trip. Hearing of someone struggling to
feed and provide shelter for his child is not new, but watching him do it, with fear in his eyes, but assertion in his step is inspirational.If, for some reason, you have been living under a rock and don’t know what the Pursuit of Happyness is about, allow me: Chris Gardner was making very little money living with his girlfriend and raising their son. After she got tired and left him, he fought for a couple dollars here and there and faced homelessness. He is now making millions and it has nothing to do with the sales of his book or the film depicting this part of his life.
Often, I joke that if I had a child I would be more motivated. Cathy Hughes bought a radio station, then went through a divorce and lost her home. She had to sleep in the radio station with her young son eventually building a radio and television empire (Radio One & TVOne). Chris Gardner accepted an unpaid internship with the slight possibility of becoming a stockbroker and you don’t need to tell me that the idea of spending a night in a homeless shelter with his son fueled him in his pursuit to excel.
I know what it feels like to see yourself making a certain amount of money or fulfilling your
dream career, but for whatever reason, we are not taking the steps. Whether it is our generation or maybe just me, our obstacles range from laziness to fear, but we must overcome them. For Cathy Hughes and Chris Gardner, they had a mouth to feed, a life to nurture, and that served as just the motivation they required to achieve greatness. In retrospect, they did just that, and we can all now see the extent of it, but greatness is an everyday feat, completely attainable to you and me. Commit to achieving your best in all that you do and everyday you will have made a significant contribution to your own success and, undoubtedly, that of others. That is greatness.So, climbing down off my horse, I hope that I sufficiently shared how The Pursuit of Happyness reminded me that motivation is within me. Oh, and before I step down completely, please remember to stay true to what you love, otherwise, you won’t be truly happy. On that note, have a great week and feel free to post comments on my blog if you want me to discuss something in the future.
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